Anyway, my friend and I are going to hang out tomorrow, well hopefully, I hate it when plans cancel on you in the last minute, so I'm trying to avoid that as much as possible. I also have a confession to make, you may think that I'm going to mall to shop and socialise with my friend, but really I'm just going for the food, and some company so I don't look like loner. I know, I know, it sounds like I'm heartless, but gosh I am craving for some junk food right now. Hopefully I can hang on until tomorrow.
For some reason, the concept of documenting my thoughts and feelings into a blog is quite interesting, especially because one year from now I can look back through this blog and read about my experiences. And also, I had like four other blogs before, but for some reason I deleted them, so now I have to deal with the fact that I'll never be able to read about what happened two years ago again. Although, primary school was 50/50 so it doesn't really matter. But still.. Okay, enough gloating, I've got some stuff to write about! Well, this year has nearly come to and end, I mean there's one term left so I mean that's pretty much the end of the end year, but anyway, I feel like I should write about some of the things that have happened so far,
1. I'm closer to figuring out what kind of a person I am. I'll elaborate, back at the start of the year, I was fresh out of the Primary School factory and was entering my way into the jungle of new memories and experiences that is high school. I didn't quite know what time of a person I was and what made me who I am, but now I have more of an idea of what separates me from other people. And anyway, people didn't really have personalities back in primary school, so that doesn't count, mainly because you're basically what your friends are like. Whereas in high school I have such a wide variety of friends, I've got a friend who's like this ultimate nerd but also likes to have a laugh, I've got this nice and caring friend who always put the people she cares about first, I've got a musical and social friend who randomly bursts into singing a song at random moments, I've got a friend who loves making herself look good yet for some reason doesn't seem conceited to us, her friends, mainly because she has a personality that's good enough to cover that up, and I've also got a friend who adores Tobias from Divergent and will go to all lengths to ensure that her happily ever after features him in it, and also is a soccer fanatic so she's pretty good at that as well (besides looking at theo James pictures online, that is). So yeah, this point is really long but it pretty much sums my first statement up!
2. I've learnt to conquer unknown feelings that I'm less acquainted with. This year I went through a storm of emotions, jealousy, helplessness, excitement, regret, happiness, shock (in a good way), and there's more. But through these ups and downs, I feel like I've identified what makes me react a certain way and have learnt to manage it better so that I don't go all psycho. I've also learnt how to act around my friends, meaning that during the start of the year I didn't quite know how to talk with them or even share my opinions, but now I can, and I know what to say and what not to in certain situations. I've also learnt to accept my feelings and embrace my thoughts because I guess that's pretty much makes up what I am.
3. What types of people to avoid. My high school is no Mean Girls, but it still features elements that aren't necessarily all unicorns and rainbows. Particularly with the way girls act. Now, girls can be so so scary sometimes. Like, the way they talk about people behind their backs is so terrifying. I'll explain why. I've had people talk to me about other people, and let's just they weren't commenting on how good Beth's (a made up name, lol) haircut looked. People talk about their own friends behind their backs. The popular crowd in my school aren't exactly royalty but they're not people who are willing to be hang out with you 24/7 either, they're pretty much in the middle. Available to you if you're desperate enough to try and talk to them. But even then, they'll still leave you in the rubble if they someone who interests them better than you do. Anyway, back to my point. I'm not saying that only popular people do this either, I've witness it first hand with my own friends as well, but that wasn't exactly gossiping. (More on that story later). So, you could be hanging out with somebody, and all of sudden they'll just be like, "ohmigosh, Beth has been so attention-seeking lately, like have you seen the way she talks to me and the others? And those clothes? What was she thinking? And she's so braggy, like I don't mean to talk about people behind their backs, but I feel like she's asking me to with the way that she shoves everything that she owns in people's faces. Like are you a shopping mall? Then why the heck are you shoving pricetags in my face like some damn sales representative?" See what I mean? Like one minute they could be talking to you about Beth, and the next they could be talking to Beth about YOU. You see what I mean? You can never trust people completely. Especially in school. I've had quite a number of moments when people start trying to get a response from me by talking about a certain person, aka. Forcing me to gossip. For example, "Hey, don't you think that Beth can be a bit controlling at times?" In this case, they could either be genuinely asking you if you've been having the same problem, and wanting advice on how to deal with it. Which would be fine, because then Beth would be the bad person here because she's hurting her friend's feelings. But the person talking to you could also be working for the enemy and is trying to find some intel to report back to her team, aka Beth. So that's why it's best to act neutral. So,"Oh, I don't know. I mean, I've never witnessed it." Will hopefully put an end to that discussion because there's no fire to fuel. Being a victim of these cases back in primary school, I can definitely say I have learnt from my mistakes.
Anyway, that's all for today's post. I'll have some points up later. Hopefully you'll enjoy some extra info from my life! Bye!
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